The weather started to turn today, and this week is going to be in the 80's. In my mind, that means spring is on the way. I also know it's almost spring because I have this desire to buy a bunch of plants and turn my yard into a flowering wonderland of joy and beauty. Roses, blooming things, trees, bushes, you name it, I want to plant it. I want a greenhouse and climbing vines over a lovely archway and beautiful pots scattered around the yard with the most amazing plants spilling over the sides. I want lush beds of plants with nice flowers that last all summer. I want waterfalls and ponds and lilies and shade and hammocks. I want raised beds with tomatoes and half-runner green beans and peppers.
The only problem with all of that is I kill plants. Dead. I am the human version of agent orange. I achieve the same results of dead plants whether I try hard to keep them alive or simply buy them and leave them in the hot sun with no water. It doesn't matter. I killed lavender in one week...sweet peas...9 days. I am either going to kill something with kindness or kill it with neglect. The sooner I learn to embrace this about myself, the sooner I will stop wasting money on plants that will be dead within the week.
The other telltale sign of spring: I want to clean the house and paint and do all kinds of spring-like projects like tear my kitchen apart. OK....I may be willing to admit that I want the inside of the house painted, but I don't really want to be the one to paint it. As for cleaning...well, I guess I could do that sometime soon....maybe next month? And yes, I always want to tear my kitchen apart, but the desire is especially strong in the spring. I imagine cool afternoons with all the windows and doors open as I spend time transforming my kitchen into something light and airy and happy. There would be a touch of blue, maybe a little splash of red, some other colors that are light and clean. I must resist this desire, however, because I will tear the kitchen apart, then summer will arrive and I won't have any desire to do anything in that kitchen to put it back together.
The problem is compounded because I was stuck at home today, sick and achy and miserable. I had lots of time to look around the house and the yard and had this irrational feeling that transforming my yard and house would make me feel better. What is really going to make me feel better: not being sick, winning the lottery, and hearing that Lawry's decided to start making their meatloaf mix again. Those things would make me profoundly happy and are much more in the realm of possibility than the irrational dream that I will be able to plant and maintain a dream garden while accelerating the pace on fixing up my house. Sigh...double sigh. I must be getting feverish from this illness. Time for bed.
